slow learner
Have you ever felt something with a searing intensity without quite knowing why you feel that way? sometimes I think that my emotions are like quicksilver...always in my peripheral vision but never quite within reach...in certain respects I'm happy to say that I'm thankfully a little wiser where my emotional well-being is concerned...for a bit more than 2 years I surpressed certain parts of my psyche with ruthless intent...in doing that I found out something rather ironically amusing though...when you surpress one component somehow or other a great many other things get buried too...after awhile it gets to a point that everything is faintly tinged with gray...all I really got from it was a temporary sense of numbness coupled with those same incomprehensible flashes of feeling without a recognisable source...it was kinda like feeling bone weary even though you'd slept the day away...I have to admit that I'm a pretty slow learner considering that it took me 2 years to figure out that I was gently injuring myself bit by bit...that I wasn't just keeping everything out...I was also locking myself in*soft laugh*perhaps now...while I might not immediately clasp an outstretched hand...I might be persuaded to walk that one step closer towards it*wistful smile*
Heya Nic,reading what you posted there and partialy scratching my head to understand what you just wrote.I can see that you have found the source of the problem...correct me if i am wrong.Well at least now you've come to know that you've been hurting yourself for the past 2 years.Its nvr to late to change right?Anyways Hope that you've chosen the path that you're most comfortable moving towards to.See ya Nic
Posted by: Redeemed Soul | October 14, 2006 10:51 PM
It's never too late to learn I guess. :)
At least you've learned what you think you've learned and no more ouchie oochie inside but have learnt the lesson learned that the ouchie oochie has been learned away!
live the carefree life! Hurrah.
Posted by: John KJ | October 16, 2006 04:36 PM
You know, the scary thing about your post is that i vaguely understand what you said.
You have identified a problem. Have you decided what steps to take now? =O
Posted by: ArcticFox | October 30, 2006 07:03 PM